Yep I am in al-anon and I am ok with me. I was doing quite well until I got that cryptic email.
We never lived together. I know about the not being in a relationship bit. It is the not communicating bit that is hurtful. I never wanted to lose his friendship and I was trying be supportive. Things were great, or so I thought.
That is why It baffles me. If he were to just write and say he still at least wants me as a friend then I'm fine with that but going from being very very close and emotionally bonded to deafening silence is messing with my head a bit.
I get the reasons to not be in a relationship but to be dismissive of the other person's feelings (or come across as so) isn't something they tell them to do there is it? What part of 'can't be in a relationship' means 'flick her away like a mosquito'.
Either way it is about what I want and I want to reach out and be that friend but I am not sure if that is wise given he has to emotionally detach for his recovery (I assume!).
Part of me says F-it, if you feel like writing go ahead, just be cool and not all lovey stuff. He'd be happy to hear from you just don't expect anything back. VS How dare he toss me away like that! Ask me any given day and you'll get a different feeling.