Being able to get close to someone without them pulling away is HUGE. If someone let's you get close, that is usually a good indicator that they are mentally and emotionally healthy. They love themselves so therefore they aren't afraid to let you love them too. Alcoholics are obviously not healthy and do not love themselves so why would they let you love them? They are incapable of being emotionally present in a relationship which is usually why we don't feel "whole" when we are with them. Something always feels like its missing and that missing key ingredient is true emotional intimacy and closeness.