pandora999

i had a very upsetting night last night.. and was wondering whether anyone could give me some advice.

a very short recap on our situation: my boyfriend is 24, and a wonderful boyfriend to me. our relationship really is perfect apart from the drinking of course. i should point out that he is never abusive or mean to me when he is drunk, in fact he becomes very loving, huggy, etc. but he gets drunk to the point of not being able to stand up. he holds down a job which he is doing well in, (misses the occasional day of work due to drink, maybe once or twice a month but they are very lenient, which is lucky for him). pays his share of rent bills etc, in fact he is more responsible in that area than i am, making sure bills get paid on time. he cut out hard liquor after i confronted him about his drinking about a year and a half ago, only drinks beer now. he used to drink whisky and beer every day back then. now he drinks beer i'd say 3-5 times a week and gets blind drunk 1-2 weeks. it is an improvement but of course still not good enough. he knows he has a problem and said that he is not ready to quit drinking. his mother and father are successfully recovered alcoholics. we've been together for 2 1/2 mostly happy years. i do NOT want to leave him because of this.

last night we brought several friends back to our place for a little after party (my friend played a show) and even though we had had a problem the night before when he got drunk on a work night and brought his even more drunk (and highly obnoxious) friend home with us, i decided that things would be fine. BAD decision. i could kick myself.

i stayed up with them until about 4am (later than i usually do) when and my friend and i decided to crash out for the night. about 3 hours later i still wasn't getting any sleep due to the noise they were making in the kitchen so i decided to go out and give them a piece of my mind.

this is what i saw:

my bf swaying unsteadily, eyes rolling, blood pouring from a cut in his hand, blood all over the kitchen floor, and another drunk dumba** standing there laughing. i called for my friend to come help and we together got the bleeding to stop and bandaged him up. all the while he was telling my friend to leave him the hell alone, if he wanted to bleed all over the kitchen floor he would. it was kind of a small cut but it was bleeding fairly heavily over the floor and i'm pretty worried that if i hadn't come out when i did he may have just collapsed from blood loss? am i being irrational? see, i'm second guessing myself all the time.

i just lost it and told everyone to either go to sleep or get out. they proceeded to leave, except another obnoxious friend of his who kept repeatedly laying his hands on my boyfriend's neck to try to choke him out, with me screaming "leave him alone! just go!"

finally i got everyone out and proceeded to get him to the bed, which took a lot of effort on my part. twice this morning i carried his drunk self to the bathroom and back to make sure he didn't walk out into the apartment building hallway naked by mistaking the front door for the bathroom door (which he did a few weeks ago- i laid into him about that, saying he could have been arrested, we could have been evicted for that)

i cried all this morning, while he hugged me close and told me 'don't be sad, i love you so much' in his slurry voice.. that just broke my heart. i cried for him and me.

i just don't know what to do any more.