Hi Cafa, Welcome!! I'm sorry for the circumstances that have brought you here, but I am glad you've joined us. I was also a little overwhelmed reading your post ~ my story is a little different, but also the same! I think you will find here that we are all intelligent people (just like you)
We also understand like few others can.
I'm proud of you for detaching from your boyfriend and being willing to look deep at yourself to figure out what brought you here... you have done in 9 months what is taking me 20+ years to figure out. Kudos to you!!