I used to be in the same boat that you are in right now. I always thought that IF he would quit drinking that we would be happy and everything would be great. In my case he's quit drinking for a 18 months (though others have told me he's drinking when he goes out) and we aren't any happier. At least I'm not.
I blamed the alcohol for everything because it was such an easy thing to place blame on. You can see it, hold it, feel it, taste it...it's real. The other problems are there, but it's harder to point out and you are so overwhelmed with just dealing with the problems of alcohol that everything is one big blur. Once the alcohol is gone, there's no single thing to blame and yet things still don't work.
In my case we were married far to young (18), my first child at 21, second at 24 (and he's got a ton of issues that cause even more problems) and the whole time there was drinking, name calling, no trust, I was a verbally abused wife (some physical pushing/shoving) and in the middle there was another woman. I withdrew myself emotionally, I've kept secrets for fear of reprocussions, and manipulated things. I know I did these things and I know I did them because of everything that has gone on, but at the same time when I was supposedly trying to make it work when he quit drinking I just couldn't change 15 years of programming.
I know he's quit doing things, I know he's a pretty good dad for the most part now, I know that this isn't where he wanted us to end up. I can see the effort he's put into changing himself.
He wants someone who can be emotionally invested as a partner and I just can't be that person.
We make better roommates than husband/wife.