I think for me, the hardest thing to get over was the concept that I somehow was responsible for him.
That I had married him, for better for worse, and that regardless of what he did to me, I had taken an oath and God would help me keep it.
It took me many years to realize that it wasn't godly love that kept me hanging on -- it was pride. Pride that I was strong enough and amazing enough that I stayed with a man who gave me nothing but demeaning rants and repeat rapes. Because that's how GOOD a woman I was.
I'm still fighting stinkin' thinkin' but I'm fighting it from the outside now. And that's a much easier place to fight it.