Has anyone else found that thoughts or feelings they had before they started drinking or using are coming up again in recovery?
Well yes, but this is a very positive aspect of my recovery. I started drinking at 15, and I was very goal oriented, I was friendly and outgoing but not egocentric, and I was a very positive person. I felt I had a grip on life and I knew where I wanted to go. Once I started drinking is when I got full of myself, I thought I had all the answers and thought that happiness and success were all found at a beer party where I was the toast of that party. I was living the last 27 years still thinking I was king of that party, and I became negative about anything else other than partying. I was a standout in my high school days and got into a good college, and have had successes in life in spite of really just reliving my high school glory days over and over. Now without the booze the ambition to be more has come back into play. I now feel a renewed vigor that I haven't felt since I was 15 or 16. The goals are more about lifetime accomplishment, friendships, and happiness as opposed to just looking forward to the next drunkfest. I truly feel like I am getting back to the real me.