"Willingness cannot be manufactured out of thin air. The addict has to earn it through pain".
Patrick Meninga
I feel the same is true of codependency. If you read some of my earlier posts here, you'll see exactly what I'm referring to.
For me, it finally reached the point where I was sick and tired enough to surrender. I laid down my 'weapons'.
So very ironic for me, a recovering alcoholic, to be unable to grasp that simple concept regarding alcoholism/addiction in another. I truly cannot control the behavior of another, I can merely protect myself.
I needed to let healthier people do my 'thinking' for me.