Originally Posted by Starryknight
I am wondering if Prozac at 8 years sober contributed, in the end, to relapse at 23 years sober. I felt SO much better on prozac. Nothing bothered me. No need to work the steps (except 10, 11,12 which I slowly did less and less ) I had horrible depression that Prozac lifted for a long time. Guess what? It stopped working. I kept trying to get it to work again. Tried other anti-depressants. Didn't work. Sound familiar. E.g. It stopped working (as-alcohol, etc. Sometimes does).
From Prozac, it was easy to justify trying other prescription meds. Eventually convinced myself I could use lorazepam, then ambient, finally Adderall and finally, back to alcohol.
Did anti-depressants lead me down a garden path to eventual relapse? Possibly, yes.
I have depression but due to my alcoholic and addict condition, At this point I think even sanctioned meds are killers for me. It's a double edge sword.
I'm hoping constant working of the steps can save my life. If not, I am probably screwed.
Originally Posted by Bam
Please, oh please, talk to your doctor about all of this. I've already switched meds several times in the last two years...without meds I get suicidal thoughts. Not being on them is NOT an option for me...I cannot imagine trying to live life through that kind of hell. Never again. Whenever what I'm currently on fails, I'll get the dosage adjusted or try something different again, as frustrating as that is. For me to not be medicated will lead to certain premature death.
I ended up causing some permanent brain damage due to my past addiction. Depression is just one symptom of that damage. When I first entered treatment the doctor wanted me to stay drug free for the first 6 months to see if I could rebound from my addiction with talk therapy and other treatments. The depression just worsened the first couple of months. Eventually I was given SSRI antidepressants after 3 months because I had become critical depressed.
After my initial diagnosis for mental illness I have gone of my meds a couple of times only to relapse and suffer the consequences. Like Bam wrote " Not being on them is NOT an option for me". Its no longer an option for me too. I did what I did in addiction and now I have to remain in treatment or suffer again.