I actually believe other people can decide if you're an alcoholic. But in terms of your ability to get well, it only matters if you do.
Consider your relationship with alcohol like you would with a person. Are you on equal terms? Can you take it or leave it? How much planning goes into your drinking? Are you thinking about it far in advance of actually doing it?
The power of denial and the tendency to compare and not identify with other alcoholics can keep us stuck for a long time.
We suffer at our own pace.