Originally Posted by
sojourner 
KiKi: You are misunderstanding the three C statements -
Those are statements directed at the friend/family member of the addicted loved one. It means, "I did not cause my loved ones addiction, I cannot control my loved one's addiction, and I cannot cure my loved one's addiction."
Many of us are stuck in guilt - that somehow we do have the power to cause someone to want to use drugs/alcohol. Many of us have listened to the addict tell us over and over that we are to blame for their troubles, that it is because of us that they use drugs or alcohol. So that is why the Three C's are referred here so much.
Hope that helps.
Yes, thank you.
However, I fit in both of those categories. So my feelings are entertwined.
And I guess this is the point I'm trying to clearify in my mind.
While I have to deal with my daughters choices, they have to deal with mine as well.
THe growth takes place between both. Them and me.
When I was a child growing up in Croatia, children had their place. Grown ups did what they did, it didn't mean children were suppose to act up about it. I'm not talking about mean spirited discipline either. Children were suppose to "WANT" to help their parents, not out of duty or demand, but out of love. We were suppose to listen to our parents cause we trusted them and loved them not because we feared them.
I tried to raise them like that too. Maybe I was wrong.