Swan and Forwardlooking big big congrats on your 90 days plus milestones and apologies for not being around to celebrate with you but well done
. You both should be really proud.
Really, Tom, Isaiah, Akasha, Caribbean and anyone else I am posting tonight as I need your help!! I have had some serious drink thoughts over the last weekend. It was my 39th birthday on Monday and my hubby and myself as a treat went away to another city for a night as a break on Sat/Sunday. The hotel was fab as were were upgraded to a suite by a very nice receptionist and so the thoughts started. A break from the kids, time to relax, nice bar etc...I ignored the thoughts, remained positive and had a coffee instead. We headed into the town and did some shopping and after went to a small Irish bar for soup, again the thoughts of what if. That night a lovely meal, again the thoughts and after we go to a bar to watch a great band...by then I had had enough and just wanted to go home. It was only 11 O'clock and my husband was gutted as he wanted to stay as it was his break too but for me I just felt miserable and I was determined that he was going to be miserable too!!! He could not understand how I could stay out late on so many other occasions and not have alcohol and on this one occasion be so stressed. I couldn't understand or explain it either but I felt very resentful that he could have a drink and I couldn't. Anyway it has progressed as one of my very close pals in 40 on Friday and all my friends with husbands are meeting for drinks in a hotel on Saturday nightand I just feel very stressed about it already. They are a great bunch of people,the night is normally lots of laughter, dancing, joking and DRINKING. I will not drink but in my mind I am reasoning on why not??? I have read back on my posts and my journal and I still nearly find myself saying that I am ok now!!!! Ah it was not that bad. Madness I know even as a type it but why I am becoming so resentful, why now do I feel that I am dull and want to drink. Why now do I think that I am ok??? My feelings are chaotic and it is really worrying me. I will not drink!!! Please guide me through this rubbish time...I feel all emotional about it!! I was just wondering how are other people coping with partners etc drinking etc? thanks in advance I really need some advice.
