Sorry you are in this situation. Recently back too and it sucks. Just keep posting because the people on here are AWESOME and really help you through it with great advise. Oh and a boot in the arse if you need one! Personally, that boot is what helps me because I tend to feel bad and keep getting stuck.
We all can help each other no matter where we are on our path. I am hoping my new path does not include the nonsense of an active alcoholic.