Originally Posted by
FormerDoormat 
i got in an argument with him last night and slapped him in the face and told him i never wanted to see him again and he laughed and said "fine." i know i was wrong and let my emotions take over, but can he really mean that? i am his only child and we have always had the most amazing relationship and i felt like he was the one person in the world who would NEVER do anything to hurt me. he opened a beer in the car once while i was driving, i believe just to hurt me.
is he pushing me away? does he really not love me anymore?
He does love you, and you can't let his warped reaction hurt your feelings, as hard as it is. He might not want to, but he IS pushing you away... maybe not intentionally but to clear the path so he can continue drinking.
When my AH relapsed after he had brought our kids through their teen years sober, they confronted him and he gave them similar reactions. I remember the very first time he brought alcohol to a BYOB restaurant that we had gone to as a family every single Saturday night when he was sober. The kids looked like they had been hit by a truck when they saw him take it out of the bag. When they confronted him and said that they would not stay in the restaurant and eat dinner with him if he was going to drink, he said "Fine." He was basically telling them that he preferred the company of alcohol to their company at that moment.
After they got up and left, totally distraught, he opened his bottle, and while he drank, tears streamed down his face. It was an incredibly sad thing to see. But I was incredibly proud of my kids for establishing their boundary and following through right on the spot.
Please learn all you can about alcoholism and go to AlAnon. Your keeping your wits about you will help you, and help your mom and dad in the process.