HI kmprim,
welcome to SR.
Alcohol makes people say and do things
they never would do
were they not in the depths of their disease.
I hope you'll check out the ACOA forums as well,
and I'm sure others will be along soon
to welcome you to the forum.
You've found a good place to get support
and friendship during your problem
but also to find out more about yourself in the process.
Welcome to SR!