in the past I tried cold turkey, I stopped drinking for months at a time then some how a bottle of wine would show up in the house, because someone "gave" it to us as a gift / or some beer would be bought for "cooking" with - I have a rib recipe that includes 3 beers, and my ribs are amazing - woman and men i dont even know that have tasted them have walked up to me and told me they would marry me if i cooked for them my ribs.
I stopped a few months ago - i myself bought beer last month because my wife and i wanted ribs, thus i drank the rest of the 6 pack - 3 beers moved onto me buying more beer the next week. not for cooking but for myself to have 1 or 2 a night - then today for the football game i bought a 12pack for use in some hot wings. I knew what the hell i was doing. I bought that beer to get drunk, but i didn't control my self I let not only me but my family down - i am a father of 2 beatuifull daughters, 1 is 2 and 1/2 now, and the other is almost 12 weeeks old. I am crying right now because I bought that beer to get drunk tonight, and i did. , not only did i drink most of my 12 pack but my friends that came over to watch the game with me brought over a 12 pack of there own, i think i drank 6 out of theirs. I am so upset with myself.
my throught process is really messed up, I was sober for so long about 6 or 7 months, and now im back to square 1. my family is sleeping right now and im trying to be a better man and not beat myself up. but i really hate myself right now.
I apreshate the AA quotes. I have never been to AA, my father has been in AA, and he still goes. my problem with AA is its hard for me to make time to go, not only that but I am embarssed for myself that i NEED to go. I am ashamed of my adiction and i dont know how to get over that.