You have near a thousand posts over a four year period on this forum,
and you still don't relate potential health issues with your binge drinking?
If you are indeed afraid, what level of fear is required for you to take responsible action to end this suffering you are inflicting? The answer for me was "enough". When you hit "enough", help is available. My hope is you endure no more pain than needed to get you to do what you need to do.
Patient: "Doctor, it hurts when I do this".
Doctor: "Quit doing that".