Even when I was heavily involved in AA, I didn't like the term "dry drunk." If someone isn't drinking, they must at least be trying to get sober.
I understand that "working the program" is life-saving to many, but I also empathize with people who have a hard time with it (i.e. turning their will/life over to a Higher Power, seeing themselves as powerless, etc.) I don't think it's helpful to tell every person who relapses that they just didn't work the program hard enough. They may need professional help or some other form of support to live a happy sober life.
I say this because I remember being new in AA and terrified of turning into a dry drunk - it was almost worse than being an alcoholic...... or like a threat if I didn't follow every letter of the law. That being said, I really love the program overall and still would recommend it to anyone trying to get sober. I use the tools I got there every day.