HI and welcome.
I couldn't help but respond as my AH filed for D once ago on me. I had hung in there with him while he tried to get sober and stay there. But when I couldn't stand being treated the way I was by him in his alcoholic fog I asked for a real break.
We had tried marriage counseling many times sober and not. This last time the therapist suggested to me that everytime we separated - we didn't really stay apart and that perhaps a real break would help us to move forward in any direction. So one year ago that is what I did. I came here for support as AH didn't think I meant it at first and continued to call or email. When I didn't respond, he threatened D but it didn't happen until nine months later.
I too felt the hurt and wondered why he wasn't fighting for me. He did in the past but nothing changed too much each time. I have learned over the year that he can't help himself so how can he work on our marriage. I don't like it, it hurts but I keep stopping myself to remember that I have the choice to live with him as he is or to wish him better days and let go. Bottom line is that when you see a problem and take a stand - you get the following reactions: a)a positive response, b) a negative response, c) no response.
Focus on taking care of yourself right now and recognize that your husband is not talking, it is the A talking. You standing in the way of his A is not something he can handle right now. It isn't a personal choice against you - it is a driving sick force that is controlling his choices.
BTW, while my AH filed - I discovered that he may have not done it correctly and it most likely will not fly with the courts as is. I have tried to tell him so but he won't listen. I will be contacting a lawyer soon to see what else can be done.