I have separated from my AH and am moving toward divorce.
I still have a voice that says, "if you could just...
be more understanding
trust him more
give him a chance
fulfill your marriage vows
and on and on
then you both could be happy.
But here's the thing.
I can't.
Now I am not saying whether I (and he) would be better off if I could just...
I am saying that the discussion is irrelevant. I can't.
All I can do is honor where I am and where I am is I can't hang with him as is.
So, that, somehow, gives me permission. Not to know that I am doing the best thing (which we so desperately want to do), but that I am doing all I can do and that is okay.
Hugs,
peace