Originally Posted by
tjp613 
How old is this guy anyway?
He'll be 59 next month.
Although I have realized in the last six months that the "12-year-old attitude" doesn't just apply to exploring the sights on the weekends. It used to be that we would have wonderful weekend, exploring the city, exploring the countryside, traveling everywhere within a 2-hour radius to the point everyone told us we should write a book.
It's only when I moved physically close to him six months ago, so that I didn't have the giant distance from him during the week, that I realized how manipulative and controlling he really was. When I lived an hour away, it easily passed as him worrying about me getting home safe, etc.
I can honestly say that I don't regret the last several years with him, which surprises me considering where things stand now. It really was a lot of fun, and I learned a ton of things that will be really useful later in life. I can also pick out a good restaurant from a mediocre one by simply reading the menu, I have learned to predict basics of the country's economy based upon current events, and all sorts of things. (I actually moved all my stock money into foreign funds just before the US stocks tanked, and then into stable funds just before the foreign ones followed suit - not that it matters now because he spent it all anyway).
I suppose in some ways I could say that all this money I contributed to his sinking ship was "tuition" - because I have learned a great deal (and that's not counting all I have learned about alcoholism!)...
The psychologist at work told me that if G didn't care about me so much he wouldn't have gone into rehab this quickly, and that it was a credit to me... Then realized that's the last thing a codependent needed and added a hasty, "Please don't take that as a requirement to stay or anything - it's up to you and what you want for yourself." But nonetheless, it's comments like that making this decision so difficult, since I have learned so much, and I have quite a few wonderful memories (five scrapbooks full)...
If only that smile could have stayed.