Don't apologize! Nobody was ever injured, fatally or otherwise, by a long forum post.
I can't really tell you what to do, because your situation is yours, and your decisions are yours to make, but I can tell you some of the things that I have learned.
It's not your fault. You didn't cause it, you can't control it, you can't cure it. He is going to do what he is going to do and that's that.
My A would lash out at me if I got between him and his alcohol. If I tried to stop him, he'd tell me how it was my fault he was drinking because I didn't do/say something properly, I didn't remind him how sick it made him feel, etc, etc, ad nauseum, until I was well trained to just apologize for everything. When I stopped playing into his need for me to take the blame, he'd get defensive, start yelling more, and eventually started talking about how his health was failing and he wouldn't be around for much longer and he hoped I'd take better care of the next guy, etc, etc. It's a miserable feeling being told things like that, but it was 100% manipulation on his part because he didn't want to come face to face with how bad his problem had become.
Your family had a drug problem. Your husband has a drug problem because he continues to use them. You have a drug problem because your husband uses them. You cannot fix your husband's drug problem, but you can fix your own - you just need to decide the best way for you to accomplish this.
He's not going to get help as long as people allow him to continue without needing to get help, and you're not going to be much help to anyone (especially not yourself or your children) if you don't solve your own problem. He's a sinking ship... He'll swim if he wants to swim, but if you wait around and try to get him to do it you're going to end up sinking with him, so you need to figure out how you're going to swim for yourself.
(((russell))
Situations like this are never easy, or we wouldn't all be here.