beautifulgirl
I am so sorry that you are dealing with all of this. You have so much on your plate but it can be addressed "one bite at a time". Looking at the whole picture at once can be absolutely overwhelming......so take it in smaller portions and figure one thing out at a time. It doesn't all have to be figured out all at once.
I divorced a child-man 28 years ago. He also said that he'll smoke pot whether I like it or not. He didn't work. He didn't watch our small son. I finally got a belly full but I had to get to that point in my own time. Our son, now a child-man himself, didn't fall far from that paternal tree.
Take it one day at a time and know that there are people out here who understand at least a part of what you are dealing with (addicted loved one). Take care of yourself.
gentle hugs