I've definitely had intimacy issues with my AH. He has often complained about our lack of sex and used it as a weapon, or to deflect attention off of his drinking. I feel that it is just a symptom of the real issue at hand. I really find it hard to feel intimate with my AH when he behaves like a self absorbed drunken fool. He did have a period of sobriety in the past, and it took awhile for me to trust him enough for things to improve in that area and a long string of sobriety especially. I don't think things will ever be like it may have been had he not abused alcohol. Years of his abusive drinking has done a lot of damage. He has been in relapse for 5 or 6 years now, and yea all the nasty behaviors are back. I've been pulling back away from him more emotionally and sex and emotions are united. In fact, I have been seriously considering leaving him. I think fear keeps holding me back. I've been married almost 25 years. So, just saying I can relate and have felt the same things in my relationship with my AH.