Steve, your pain is yours not to be judged or invalidated by someone's addict or pain. You have the right to express how you feel, people have Off topic stuff here that has nothing to do with addiction so your codependency issues are valid and you should keep pounding them out here. It took me about 2 years after my first harsh consequence to embrace recovery, it takes time to get to a place were recovery is possible. Continue to post because you have as much valid right as anyone on here.