He said he didn't think he could and that it is a disease so I shouldn't expect it, he can't help it?
This says to me that he does not want to quit. And when someone does not want to quit, they likely will not quit, sad to say.
He said that he shouldn't have to live w/ conditions that I am not his mother.
This is a very immature way of thinking. THIS is how he thinks. It is very difficult to get someone to change the way they think. I'm willing to bet that most of us here have tried.