JW123, You have every right to be upset right now and I can hear your heartache you are feeling right now! It's obvious you still love this person very much and it can be very hard to get through the breakup.
Cry all you want. It really can make you feel better. Mourning a loss is mandatory if you truly love someone and have to let go. Keeping it all in is not healthy. Give yourself time to grieve. Allow yourself time to feel grief and sadness. It's a part of the healing process, and you shouldn't try to ignore your feelings. A few weeks to a few months is a normal range of time. If you find that you can't get over the break-up after a few months, you may need to get professional counseling or other help.
Find things to do to keep busy. Keeping busy will keep you from dwelling on the break-up. This is a great time to start a new hobby. Find activities to keep you mentally and physically occupied. Physical exertion will also help release endorphins which will make you feel better.
Accept reality. Facing the reality of your situation will help with the healing process. Get involved in a support group, if necessary.Therapy can be very beneficial. Move on. Get on with your life, even if it isn't exactly what you wanted.
If you find it hurtful for your friends to hang around his hangouts, let your friends know. Your real friends will be understanding and do what they can to help you get through this.
PRAY...... even people who don't generally pray can feel a sense of relief from praying......
BE STRONG......this is a time consuming process. I have heard that it takes half of the length of the relationship to get over the loss of it...... so if you were together for one year, it will typically take six months to get over it......Don't drunk dial him. You will feel foolish later......Don't make excuses to see him or call him. Just let go, no matter how much it hurts......Don't date his friends to get back at him. It only makes
YOU look stupid.
The first step in working on moving on is getting rid of anything that will trigger memories. This can be
VERY hard. If you find that you cannot throw away these items, put them into a box and take them to a friend to hold for you until you are ready to do something with them. Items to remove are not limited to: photos, letters, trinkets they bought for you or with you, movies you watched together and clothes they gave you. If you have songs that remind you of them, delete them from your music library.
Delete them from your address book, and/or cell phone. You shouldn't look at their number daily, and you really shouldn't use it.
Cut ties with mutual friends. This is hard to do, but it is almost always necessary. If you keep the mutual friends, you will be faced with things that remind you of him all the time. It can cause a lot more heartache and you are likely to have a longer healing time because of it.
If you have photos of him on your cell phone, myspace, or facebook...
DELETE THEM! If you don't want to permanently delete them, save the photos to a disc, then delete them from the phone and internet sites.
PUT THE DISC AWAY.. at a friend's house or somewhere that you wont see it constantly.
When you hear a song on the radio that reminds you of him, turn the station immediately and think of something else. This takes a lot of thought control but is very important.
Avoid his phone calls or tell him not to call you anymore. If you really want to get over him, letting him play with your mind will not help you. It is really hard to ignore his calls or emails, and takes a
LOT of willpower. The person you care about so much is exactly who you want to hear from...... so when he calls, you want to answer it.
Just don't do it!
If you know anyone else going through a similar situation, befriend them and help each other. They might understand you more than other people will.
Get a lot of sleep and exercise. There is never a bad time to get healthy!
Staying immersed in the past isn't good for you. Figure out where you want to go with your life, and enjoy living in the world you create through your dreams and plans.
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