Choosing sobriety as a way of life
I've been reading on these forums for a few weeks now and have enjoyed the helping words often given to apply to myself. For some that have read my original "preventative maintenance" thread, I really don't consider myself an alcoholic because it never controlled my life or turned it down in a bad way.
I just started to see the signs that it could become bad, so that maybe I have the potential to become an alcoholic because of my personal addictive tendencies. With the utmost respect I hear the stories on here and it is enough to make me realize the best route is that of sobriety.
But i feel orphaned. I'm not a recovering anything, I can't identify with AA or some of the pits of despair to where some members have been. Does that make me any less needy of the support? I'd like to believe not, but I notice that people are fairly quick to label.
I grew up religious, but I am not particularly religious at the moment. I don't thank a higher power to free me from the vice of alcoholism, I simply choose to do so on my free will because the grip has yet to take a hold on me. Tonight was empowering for me: I played in a new men's hockey game where I found myself at a bar afterwards. To 10 people's surprise after offering me drink upon drink, I finally replied, "I don't drink". Now these people are new in my life so most just figured, well that, that i don't drink - and left it at that as I had an iced tea. It was great, i enjoyed myself and not once felt the urge to drink. But around family and friends, the thinking is, if you decide to stop drinking for good it is because you must have a "problem". And this stereotype resonates seemingly everywhere.
I believe I have a problem, yes - so i searched out like minded individuals and stumbled upon this website - but I would like to know within this community if there are others who are simply not drinking because they have made a conscious decision in their life to better it. Not because their life hit rock bottom, not because religion says so, or god, not because they are on a diet and watch calories, or for health because their liver needs to heal.
People who are to a lesser extent compelled to better their life and make smart decisions before bad ones occur. I'm proud to have met people here, and I would like to help as many people as possible... are there any others who understand what I mean?