Hugs from here, too. That sounds positively awful.
But you know what's not awful?
1) You are separated.
2) You can see that it's messed up that a 41-year-old needs his relatives to help him with things that for any adult should be something one can handle on one's own.
3) You made a choice for tonight that means taking care of yourself rather than doing what others expect of you.
Those are three really, really good things.