Kindeyes, I totally understand your situation regarding what your son will do, and where he will go. It's heart breaking and scary at the same time. As mother's it kills us to watch our kids go through all of the repercussions of drug addiction. For me, I couldn't let my son go to a sober living, or an Oxford house type of place. My motherly instinct told me he wasn't done with his drug runs yet. I didn't want him to hook up with some bad people and get into trouble or die. I wasn't thrilled about him being with alot of other addicts, of which some were violent offenders, and corrupt individuals. So, I let him live here. My husband and I gave him 1 shot.
He was told, if he does drugs here, that he would have to leave. He was not allowed to sleep all day, and stay out all night. Ofcourse he tried both. That was a big struggle that wore me out. Trying to get him up in the morning, and to bed at a decent hour was impossible. He was also told that he must have a job. He tried to find one, and waited for a great job in the Laborers Union.
The bad news is that he left my home and went back out to use drugs.
Because he was told, if you go back out on drugs, you cannot come back here, my husband and I stuck to our word. While he was out on his binge, his job in the Laborers Union came through for him. Great pay, and great benefits. He blew it. He was out living with other users, and didn't go for his initiation.
He went back into treatment again, and asked if he could come back here, and the answer was NO. It was the worst and most heartbreaking NO I ever had to say. I anguished and grieved over it. It hurt me deeply. I posted here about it, and all of the others agreed that coming here wouldn't be good for any of us. So, he went down to Florida, with my family. He drove them all crazy too. He went out on drugs again, on the oxys, and roxys, amongst other drugs, I'm sure.
This last time, he went cold turkey off of those drugs, and has seemed to have learned his lesson. He has been clean since May. He now lives with my sister and her husband. He has his own private section of a big and beautiful house in Florida. My sister didn't want him to go live anywhere else. He is doing well, and working. He has changed back to my son. My real son. I can honestly say I am so grateful that my sister and brother inlaw have taken my son in. I have peace knowing that he is with his family and clean. My sister also has 11 years of recovery.
Rehab is called Rehabilitation, because the addict really needs to learn how to rebuild his life, and change everything. He has to relearn how to take care of himself properly. The facility that my son was in, suggested sober living. The professionals know that back with the family isn't always the best place. It's such a difficult situation for the addict, and for everyone who loves him. Especially the moms. We hurt with them, sometimes more.
This is why I pray. I have found comfort with prayer. Placing my son in GOD'S hands, and asking him to help. As of now he has. I am so thankful. Your son is being prayed for too. It seems as soon as I started praying for your boy, he went into treatment the next day. Coincidence??? Probably. But I like to think that GOD heard me. I always think, maybe these prayers are working, and maybe they aren't. But at least I feel like I am doing something to help. Anything I have ever asked for in a prayer has been given to me. Not always the minute I asked, but eventually. Faith is a great place to turn to, when I am frightened or worried. I truly hope things work out well for your son. He will be alright. The only thing he has to change is everything. And the main thing is for him to stay clean. Everything else will fall into place if he does.