Cyranoak

...this is a place where we discuss what helps us make it one day at a time. You don't need to be politically correct here, but you do need a thicker skin for when you hear things you don't want to hear, or for when people call you on things you say and post that are inconsistant with 12-Step recovery.

You are new here, it is crystal clear that you are new in recovery as well, and you might consider just reading for awhile before posting again. And, when you do post, try posting about yourself and your recovery, not your husband. Your thoughts, your feelings, your motivations, and your passive-aggressive somewhat argumentative "poor me" lines you include in many of your posts (and, literally, I've read them all). Specifically, lines like this: "I thought the F&F Forum was where we codependents could discuss what helps us make it one day at a time! I didn't realize we needed to be politically correct here."

We are welcoming here, we do care, and many of us have years of experience and recovery related directly to situations like yours. None of us are the first, and sadly none of us will be the last. We will, however, police each other by calling each other on our BS. It is part of our recovery.

Take what you want and leave the rest.

Cyranoak

P.s. I titled this "You are right" because I knew if I did you would read it. How did I know that? Because I'm very much like you, and I've lived a situation very much like yours. Please read more and post less for awhile. I think you'll like the result.