Originally Posted by
Cyranoak 
You don't have a damn thing to do with his drinking. He's got you so wrapped around his little finger that you don't know up from down. He manipulates you with guilt, "love," and anything else he can and you accept that it's you not him? Good Lord. Alcoholics lie and manipulate better than anybody else on earth (including psychopaths). Often they don't even know they are doing it. It's like breathing to them.
YOU CANNOT MAKE HIM DRINK. YOU CANNOT FORCE HIM TO DRINK. YOU DON'T HAVE THAT POWER. STOP FOCUSING ON HIM. FOCUS ON YOU.
Go to Al-Anon. Go to Al-Anon. Go to Al-Anon. Read Codependant No More. Read Codependant No More. Read Codependant No More.
You're killing me Andrea.
I'm a newbie to alanon. The above post though seems to have nailed this situation on the head to bear repeating it. So read it twice or a thousand times.
Dry drunk is what he is.
He's not drinking, but he hasn't addressed the issues that made him a drunk in the first place. It's no accident he became a drunk. There's a direct correlation between becoming a drunk and having issues underneath the drink.