So my FIL and MIL have let my twins' birthday come and go without so much as a phone call. They have made it clear that this as an act of spite because of our NC with SIL and BIL. BIL and SIL are still active - nothing has changed on that front.
MIL & FIL, have made a choice and though I disagree about the appropriateness of punishing children for the "disagreeable" actions of their parents, it is still their choice and they own the consequences therewith. It just makes me sad that they could do this to the kids
their own grandkids.
Anyway, DH has sent emails & or texts to his parents on the subject. I believe that long as he is simply expressing his feelings on the subject that this is fine, but if he is sending an email or text with any kind of expectations he needs to reevaluate himself. I guess in a nutshell I advised him to check his motives before hitting send. My in-laws are so very sick..... Thanks for letting me share.