Hi LaFemme,
I can relate to the self-loathing, especailly after a binge, but even days after I've drank. It seems somewhat constant, so it bears consideration and discussion.
I hadn't thought about different kinds of counselors, I thought they were all the same. Finding the right one is a great idea, instead of taking the first banana off the tree, lol.
To me, focusing on the past is akin to digging up an old grave, sure it may be my past life, but the bones are bare and the smell is just plain rank, lol.
Thanks for your help, it means much to me.