Very powerful. It's hard for me to grasp, since I'm not the addict in my situation. I want to feel empathy, pity... I want to help. But the experts tell us that we can't help addicts who won't help themselves. I end up getting frustrated and angry.
My AW has suffered from OCD most of her life. Once, when she was having one of her panic attacks, I said "Can't you just stop?". Apparently, they can't. I suppose the same is true of addicts. I've asked my AW why she can't just stop drinking, and she doesn't seem to want to. Maybe she just can't.