At times I am afraid.......
I was raised in a very religious household as I was growing up. Church three times a week, Sunday Morning, Sunday Evening and Wednesday Evening. I had a good foundation with my higher power.
Through my life, I have struggled to maintain that connection with my higher power and until fairly recently, I felt as though I had forgotten how to pray. But I remembered something from my childhood this morning that I'm going to use and I thought I would share it.
When I was little, I went to Bible School. Of course we did all kinds of crafts and things along with our Bible lessons. For one of the crafts, we used tongue depressors, ribbon, silver spray paint and hard pasta alphabet letters. With these supplies we made a little sign to hang in our rooms at home. The sign said:
At times I am afraid, I will trust in thee.
When I would get frightened at night alone in my dark room, I would put my head under the covers and say it over and over and over again until I eventually calmed down and would no longer be fearful.
I am afraid for my beautiful son. I am afraid for so many people here on SR who love addicts. I'm afraid for the addicts whom they love. But someone (I think it was Ann) suggested that we should turn our fear into faith. So I'm using that little sign I made (what feels like) a million years ago as another healing mantra. It is my Step Three mantra:
At times I am afraid, I will trust in thee.
gentle hugs