Originally Posted by
Austinchica 
I keep thinking , I don't want some other girl to have the family that I couldn't have.
Do you know what another family got when my EXAH remarried, and to an older woman with half-grown kids? They got an addict husband/stepfather who was HIV+. He died a few years ago from AIDS-related complications.
Somehow I think I got the much better deal in life, although I am sad that he died as a direct result of his addiction (he contracted HIV through sharing needles with someone else while I was in rehab).
You say he's trying to work the steps, and has been working with a sponsor the past four months. Short of you being with him every minute of the day, I don't see how you know that to be true. Talk is cheap.
He is also an abuser. That is an animal of a different color as far as I'm concerned. The steps won't clear that up in my opinion.