I'm sorry that you have to go through this and I can't imagine the pain of having to face these choices. I have my own problems with someone that is clean but still acts selfishly like an addict. Even leaving their own child without food .
My point is, an addict won't hate you forever because they ultimately know they deserve to be kicked out. They know what they are doing is intolerable . They just will make up any excuse to make thier life easier to get drugs.
Big hugs and strength and if you don't get it from your hubby then find it where you can .
I am so codependent it is not funny. I also have taken cAre of and supported addicts all my life.
They will definitely not change at all if you are supporting them i'n their delusion that thier addiction is not that bad.
They must live through the pain of addiction, without you shouldering the burden or protecting them. Really only then will they have to face thier own lives alone, without anyone to blame. Right now you will be blamed for putting them out, but they did it by making the choices over and over again.
They might never be the "potentially" great person you see , but if you were good parents and gave them the tools , they need to figure out on there own what thier choices bring. They must learn drugs take away more than they give. But if you keep supplying what the drugs would normally take away ,ie shelter, money for food, healthy relationships. They will never see how bad drugs ruin the big picture.