It's easy to get wrapped up in the details and go over and over everything in your head. I've done that so much I think I made myself crazy. I think in the mental health field they call it anxiety. Lately I've been taking vitamins and supplements like fish oil to calm some really bad anxiety I've been having the last few months and it's working
I do recommend Al-Anon because it can help you straighten some of these things out in your head.you hear different perspectives there. One thing you learn in Al-Anon is how to stay in the present moment. That helps to calm the anxiety too.
Hope you work it out soon.