everytime my stbx doesn't turn up for the kids the thought "flits" through my mind that he is dead or injured or arrested, because who would let their kids down if they weren't?
well, he would, and does, repeatedly. The thought flits in and flits out now, I can wave at it as it goes on through, it used to set up camp in my head, but no longer.
he is always ok, it is truely insane that he, loaded with enough alcohol to fell a bull elephant, without the faculties of binocular vision, coherent speach or any cognitive processing can glide/bump/stumble to his home without major loss to limbs, when people with all their brain-cells firing every day are harmed/robbed/killed crossing roads/walking home/etc. he is always ok.
sometimes I marvel, but I no longer worry.