Thanks for all your support,
Alice, the way the plan will work is this: While she's in rehab I'll be looking after the kids in the home we live in at the moment. We have a very good child minder who's almost part of the family. She will be helping me with the practical stuff like fetching the kids from school because I work.
When AW returns from rehab our child minder will move into the house and I will move out. The children will stay in the house with their mother during the three month probationary period, and we will share the kids's duties, so I'll get them on weekends etc. The child minder has agreed to move into the house for this time to assist AW with the kids' routine. I trust this woman with my children and she's also very aware of AW's drinking. The forensic psych (who is a child psychologist by training and approaches this from the childrens' needs) has concluded that there will be less disruption in their lives if they remain with their mother during this time.
The psych has made it abundantly clear though, that this is a probationary period and the final decision about who the kids will stay with will be based on AW's sobriety. She also stressed that, at any time after that if AW returns to her addiction, custody reverts to me. This will be built into the conditions of the parenting plan.
I'm OK with these conditions as AW is a competent mother (mostly) when she is sober. I also have such peace of mind now, words can't describe it. I feel like there are real controls in place now, as opposed to the fake controls we partners of alcoholics try and impose, like throwing the booze out etc etc. This is a legally-backed plan of action, revolving mostly around her recovery.
I'm also expected to bring my part of the deal here. The psych wants me to get counseling, for my own recovery and also for the what she calls the shock of the divorce and becoming a single parent.