I, too, don't want to use the word regret because I am grateful for the h*ll that brought me here. (on my good days) But I like this thread a lot.
What makes me saddest is how I did not honor my gut, my instincts, my heart. I twisted all these things up to try to make sense of all the insanity of addiction.
I thought I was crazy but somewhere deep down I knew I was right and that the situation wasn't healthy. But I didn't listen to that little voice. I listened to a lot of other ones instead.
I betrayed myself, and I have so much sadness for that. I'm sorry N&D (that's me), you really are worth a lot more.