Like I said, a little revenge goes a long way. I have no regrets for the few, unplanned, reactionary acts I executed at the onset of my discovery of AH affair. Hell, I wouldn't even consider them revenge because I wasn't thinking in those terms. Revenge wasn't my intention.
I was in so much pain I couldn't contain it. I'd call them acts of unleashed rage and pain, but not revenge. My advice is that if you find yourself acting out, lashing out in this way, be gentle with yourself. Speaking generally, this is when people kill each other- cases of infidelity. Crimes of passion.
Now that I think about it, I can say honestly that the only revenge I HAVE executed has been to create a life I love. Emerged from the ashes.
And seriously, I'm the poster child for using the energy of my pain to get well and stay focused. Hence the name Transformyself. I'm transforming my suffering. And damn glad I gave AH's favorite leather jacket to that homeless guy walking past my house that day I was staring at his stuff and sobbing. Still see that guy wearing it around town, too.