Laurie is right in her remarks. I also referred many to the Salvo's rehab program when ours was full and so were Govt ones. I could predict pretty accurately who could be helped and who would head for the nearest pub as soon as they were able to.
Sometimes I got a lovely surprise when I was proved wrong, and later was greeted by a clean and sober man who had last been seen, looking a lot the worse for wear.
Having been where you are now, I know how hard it is, to stay out of their troubles and let them feel all of the hassles caused by their drinking.....instead of carrying their burden for them as usual.
I often "rescued" RABF before he even knew he was in trouble, and I now wonder if his Guardian Angel felt like booting me up the bum, as much as he wanted to do it to RABF.
I can see this frazzled old Angel, shaking his head and muttering "stupid meddlesome old bat, go away and mind your own business."
When I did that, refusing to "help" in any way, other than to call an ambulance for bad withdrawals if necessary,.....he went for help and into recovery all by himself, and is still sober and doing what he needs for himself.
I pray for strength and determination to you Mambo, and all who are coping with this scenario right now.