boyt-o-boy.......are you gonna love recovery! It was a long time since I'd had any real dignity when I first walked into the doors of AA. Being honest, just walking in knocked me down another couple notches. I could look at myself in a mirror but I lothed what I saw. My physical appearance was suffering true enough but what was inside was truly grotesque to me. That stuff inside....there was no escaping that. I knew it was there whether there was a mirror or not.
All I can tell you is that everything in that post above is what the steps in AA are designed to begin repairing. You may not believe me but in VERY short order, ALL of that crap can be gone. All of it...... the fear, anxiety, depression, the compulsion to keep drinking when you know not to.....etc etc. It may seem too good to be true but that's what I'm telling you I personally found in AA. It's un-frigging-believable!!