I'm like, "And another thing!"
I don't want a big show of remorse from my husband. I really don't, because I think remorse and resentment are two sides of the same coin, and neither is really helpful in moving forward.
I have to say it takes a lot of effort for me to remain calm when he says that he doesn't feel great after quitting drinking. Part of me wants to say, "Hey, I can think of one little benefit of not drinking--you still have a partner! You're not lying in your own mess! Oh, and another--you're not dead of exposure in a bus shelter somewhere!" I just have to shake my head and realize it's the long-reaching effects of the alcohol when he says this.