"Alcoholic" is really just a label when it comes down to it isn't it. It doesn't matter if it's him or if it's you, it doesn't really matter if it's only once a month or a few beers...it doesn't matter if you're over reacting. What matters is this...Are you happy? Are the needs of you and your son being met? Are you providing your child with the best upbringing you can?
I feel guilt every day for bringing an alcoholic into my daughters life. I know now that I have mirrored my own parents relationship and I am scared my daughter will grow up and be as damaged as I am/was.
From the things you say it's quite clear to me that you're not happy with your relationship. From what you tell us about your partner he seems very childish, calling names, tit for tat behaviour.
Think about your perfect life...what does it consist of? Is he in it...as he is today, warts and all, would he be in your perfect life? You can't change him, and by the sounds of it he has no intentions of changing anything and no remorse about what he's putting you through.
What can you do to make your life better and set a good example for your boy?
Dolly...I wouldn't say she was "waffling". It takes time to work things out, detach and get some "balls", the fear of change keeps people stuck and it's only with education and knowledge and choices that people begin to realise they can change their situations, they've just got to work it out first by talking through it and learning a long the way.