Kim --
-- Your post is really honest & wonderful. I'm sorry you are going through a rough patch. You're doing something great for yourself and it will just take time. Whenever I get frustrated about feeling alone/not having sober friendships, I remind myself how little time 5 months is in comparison to the 8 or 9 years of heavy drinking. And I know this will be little help, since Germany has been frustrating for the reasons you explain, but I'd LOVE to have the chance to live abroad again. So hopefully you can take something from my envy. Congrats on 150 days. You make an excellent point about innocence, and how we don't return to who we were before, but instead become a new person in sobriety.
UBC, I didn't think you sounded patronizing at all! I was just clarifying my own post.
Have a good day, everyone.