Mama36! That's just a tremendous step what your husband just did! That makes him a real hero today! I'm sure you gave him a big hug for that. If he likes to drink then there are other places where he can do that other than in the home and when you are there.
As to your boy, I agree with the other folks. Don't beat yourself up over what's past. What is past is past. You tried the best you could. Wasn't it Abe Lincoln who said, "I did the very best I knew how..." or something like that. You had an illness. You weren't the first one to have to cope with that and you won't be the last.
Now each day you might say, "Well now what are we going to do today? Something that needs to be done? Something fun perhaps? Something we can do together?" Lots of kids have their schools say to them that they've got ADHD. They told my grandchild that. But he's turning out fine. He just needed a little love and a little growing up. I'm sure that you'll give him the love. As for the growing up, well that's something he can work on too.! Good luck and God bless. Hope the AA meeting goes well. Tell us about it later.
W.