Originally Posted by
suki44883 
So sorry you got yourself in trouble because of drinking/drugging. What is your plan to stay sober?
I'm going to focus on my spirituality. I'm going to pray every day. I'm going to try and get to whatever meetings I can when I can, even if it's not many. I'm going to come here more often. I'm going to actually finish reading the self help book I bought and try to apply what I learn from it to my life. I'm going to pray. I'm going to depend on God.
I guess that's all I really know to do. I am done. I feel like I will never get past this one. It's very very stressful. I spent alot of money that should not have been spent. Like bill money. I don't want to get in to the details because I just can't deal with refuting advice not practical to my situation, however well meaning.
This morning I BEGGED God to let me die. I am in utter anguish. I will never again judge those who take their own lives after feeling this way.